My Apologies To Elijah

Have you ever read the story of Elijah the prophet of God in the Bible?  One of the biggest events is described when Elijah, before the nation of Israel who took to devil (Baal) worshiping, proved God's might and power over that of Baal.  He set up 2 altars of wood and had them soaked with water.  He then told the priests of Baal to have their god light the fire.  Nothing happened.  Elijah asked God (the real one) to light the fire and He did.  I left out some details.  You can get the whole story in the Bible 1 Kings 18.  Anyway after that Elijah slew ~400 of the Baal priests.  Now the queen, Jezebel, who was a practicing witch of black magic as well as a devil-worshiper (sort of redundant), got pretty mad about it.  She had been denounced many times by Elijah and had many of God's prophets executed.  She puts a contract out on Elijah (or puts a hit on him).  Elijah got scared and ran away.  I used to think, what is wrong with Elijah?  He just was a conduit for God's amazing power, he conquered the forces of evil and he was afraid of Jezebel?   I felt guilty about being critical of God's prophet but the conviction was shallow.

Years, tears, and fears later my conviction has been deepened severely.  How many times, I ask myself, have I been shown the faithfulness and hand of God in my life and yet still get afraid?  I have not had to face anyone with a hit on me.   The fears I have are minuscule compared to what Elijah faced and yet still, I am afraid.  God shows Himself true, and powerful to me against those fears; however, when I face them again, I am afraid.  My fears are many. I struggle with the fear itself, as well as the shame of not trusting God.  How dare I be critical of Elijah and his fear!?  I indeed owe Elijah an apology.  If he is looking down and can hear me I say to him please forgive me.  If not, I will see him in person in the not too distant future (hopefully distant enough) and will apologize then.

More still, I am so glad that God is patient and merciful, and long suffering because He is the one that is most deserving of my apologies, and as a fallen sinful man I find myself asking forgiveness, often, on an hourly basis.

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