What am I thankful for?

I am thankful:
That leisure suits have not returned with bell-bottoms
That department stores have so much static electricity built up that I can now shock my kids instead of my younger sisters
Sucralose
Velcro
Slip on shoes
Hawaii 5-0 was remade
The Cooking Channel
Turkeys have been domesticated
Superballs
Slinkies can still be found in steel
Jocky style underwear
Being born in America
My wife and family,
Being called by God to salvation

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